Miss Manners can always be relied upon

(or as she would probably phrase it, "Miss Manners, upon whom one can always rely")

The Divine Miss M

Dear Miss Manners: Could you please educate us on the difference between a living room, sitting room, drawing room, saloon, library, lounge, parlor and boudoir?

Dog is Love by Clive Wynne

I have not read this new book about dogs, “Dog Is Love: Why and How Your Dog Loves You,” which argues that they are special because of their ability to form affectionate relationships with other species (as seems obvious), but I really enjoyed the Washington Post review.

I am currently studying Aesop’s Fables and anthropomorphism in a History of Children’s Literature class so it caught my eye that the author emphasized evidence that dogs can form loving relationships, rejecting feel good anthropomorphism about one’s pet.   After all, I love my brother’s dog Chloe and I know she is always pleased to see me, but surely it is because she recognizes I will feed or walk or make a fuss over her?   Author Clive Wynne states:

I’m not saying human and dog love are identical. I’m just saying there’s enough similarity between how dogs form strong emotional bonds and how people form strong emotional bonds that it’s fair enough to use the love word.

Wynne describes an awesome experiment intended to gauge dogs’ active affection for their people.   They put the pets’ people into a box and had them call out in distress.   All the dogs seemed upset about this but only 1/3 could figure out how to open the box to rescue her owner.    But then they fine-tuned the experiment by starting with the same box but putting food in it and training the dogs to open the box to get the food out.   Subsequently, nearly every dog was able to use its skills to open the box to free its person.   Not sure that is love but it certainly intelligence!

My furry niece Chloe

Not every dog is Lassie or Timmy, capable of daring rescues, but we sure want them to be!   Do you love your dog?  Does your dog love you?

Miss Manners

Dear Miss Manners:

What is the proper response to someone who asks, "What do you do every day? What do you do with your time?"

This is an unfortunate attempt to start a conversation, as it implies that the person being queried might be useless. Should you not be willing to overlook this, Miss Manners recommends, "I lie on the couch and read trashy novels and eat bonbons."

I love Miss Manners - like Mrs. Piggle Wiggle, she always knows!

Noel Coward's novel

I am still surprised that Jonathan Yardley did not respond to a letter I sent him last year about a book he'd been seeking, Gramercy Park, but I still enjoy his columns, particularly the "series in which the Post's book critic reconsiders notable and/or neglected books from the past." In November 2007, he devoted a full column to Laura Ingalls Wilder - if only he would devote that kind of space to Betsy-Tacy.

This week's article focuses Noel Coward, and in particular, his one novel, which is called Pomp and Circumstance. Yardley says "it is Coward to the core: a deliciously witty and ingenious entertainment that puts on full display his 'talent to amuse' (his own phrase, from the song 'If Love Were All') and his deep affection for distant, exotic and preferably sun-drenched parts of the world. It was received with considerable enthusiasm when it appeared, and -- this will come as no surprise to anyone who knows Coward's work -- holds up very well indeed after half a century."

I wish someone would bring it back into print so I could choose it for my book group!

Absentee Voting

I like Thanks, But No Thanks to Absentee Voting from the Washington Post's Marie Coco:

"I’ve always been slow to embrace new fads. I didn’t go for brown as the “new black,” and since purple is now the “new black,” I’m certainly glad I stuck with the old. The same for following my parents’ example of never buying on credit. Boy, did that one work out.

As Election Day approaches, I revel in my fuddy-duddy habits. I live in the battleground state of Virginia, where voter registration has increased 10 percent in advance of November’s presidential election, where Democrat Barack Obama has invested huge sums in a sophisticated get-out-the-vote operation and where Republicans are pushing their precinct captains to hang onto a state that hasn’t gone Democratic since 1964. Election officials are so fearful of a chaotic crush at the polls that they’re urging people to vote early with absentee ballots. Though absentee voting in the commonwealth requires voters to meet one of several conditions, officials have nonetheless made it clear that -- ahem -- it’s easy to qualify. (And voters requesting presidential-race-only ballots don't even need an excuse.)

Sorry, I just can’t. I know that if I do vote early, I’ll miss out on long lines, sore feet and the possibility of confronting an over-taxed electronic machine that might malfunction.
But here’s what else I’ll miss -- and what can’t be replaced by a quick-and-convenient early vote: Being pressed to take that one last flier from a volunteer as I walk toward the elementary school; purchasing a treat from the PTA mothers who will set up a bake-sale table outside the polls; enjoying the children’s artwork in the hallway as the line to vote snakes through the school corridors; chatting with neighbors I haven’t seen in months.

There is something magical that happens at the polls on Election Day. It is a renewal of civic culture that marks the first moment of reconciliation after the incivility of a contemporary presidential campaign."

This is why I want my nieces to come with me to the polls on November 4th, although of course they have gone with their parents!

Fan mail

I liked this Washington Post article by writer Chris Bohjalian in which he obsesses (somewhat tongue in cheek) about the random things his readers say about his books online. I must admit that like one of his critics, I had dismissed him for his Oprah popularity, but I picked up The Law of Similars while I was in Italy two years ago and couldn't stop reading, so I should forgive him for his success (easier to do now that I see signs of his sense of humor). His new book, The_Double_Bind, sounded interesting but too violent, although I suspect I will read it eventually. 

I am suddenly reminded of the fact that Jonathan Yardley did not reply to my lovely letter (several months ago) in which I responded to his 11/07 article, "Laura Ingalls Wilder's Well-Insulated 'Little House.'" He had asked for help identifying a childhood favorite, which turned out to be Gramercy Park, Memories of a New York Girlhood by Gladys Brook. I found the book, read it, and photocopied the first chapter for him. You'd think he could have sent an appreciative email. Clearly, he is not of the race that knows Joseph. Somehow I think Chris Bohjalian would have written back . . .

Quote of the Day from Doc Rivers

Doc Rivers, who never won a title as a player or as a coach, said some people unfairly diminish the accomplishments of players such as Patrick Ewing and Charles Barkley because they never won a championship.

"Patrick Ewing is one of the greatest centers to ever play the game, ever, whether he won a title or not," he said. "He shouldn't be faulted. He had teammates like me. That clearly didn't help his case."

The Washington Post called all Book Groups:

See below for the description of the woman who reads passages aloud in a Masterpiece Theatre voice. It reminded me of a woman (sadly, now deceased) who would read aloud from that month's book, sigh loudly, and tell us she had gone to great lengths to find the book in French or Russian so she didn't miss anything in translation...

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Rachel Jacobsohn, who literally wrote the book on book clubs -- The Reading Group Handbook-- estimates there are now more than a million literary discussion groups meeting regularly in this country, from the oldest one in Chautauqua, N.Y., to the one your officemates started this morning. Given that you can't swing a library card without hitting somebody in a book club, the most surprising thing about "The Book Club Play" is that no one thought of it before. Karen Zacar¿as's new comedy, which runs through March 2 at the Round House Theatre in Bethesda, should make every book lover laugh (and cringe) with recognition. Zacar¿as includes all the reading-group regulars: the aging jock who never reads the book, the mousy woman who's too shy to say what she really thinks, the African American who's invited because she's "full of diversity," the (barely closeted) snob who drones on about his literary insights, and especially the queen bee, who reads passages in her Masterpiece Theater accent and tries to control the group with ever more maniacal schemes. They're all here in this zany collection of staccato scenes that take place in various living rooms during the club's final, disastrous year.
As you might expect, area bibliophiles have been drawn to this play like bookworms to paper. Round House marketing and public relations manager Sarah Pressler says at least 60 book clubs have bought blocks of tickets to see the show.

It's a great reminder that the Washington area is packed with active reading groups. And we'd love to hear from you: Tell us about the book that sparked your group's best discussion. We'll make a list of the titles and post it on our Web site with your comments. Send your suggestions to bwletters@washpost.com. Put "My Book Club" in the subject field. Include your city and tell us how long your group has been meeting.
-- The Editors